Raising the kids breeds discontent
Illawarra Mercury
Thursday March 24, 2011
ONE in three Illawarra mums and dads do not like being a parent and 10 per cent are extremely dissatisfied with their lives, a study has revealed.University of Wollongong PhD student Justin Coulson made headlines last year when he controversially suggested that raising children led to unhappy adults, saying at the time his research identified that most parents found parenting a chore.He called on Illawarra mums and dads to help him decipher the family dynamics further.Five months and one intensive study later, the Figtree father said his findings indicated parental happiness depended on people's attitude towards the parenting role.Mr Coulson said the survey results indicated men and women who valued the role of being a parent were happier and more satisfied with their lives than those who did not."There are inherent challenges in being a parent; it's a selfless role, with the majority of parents putting themselves second for the sake of their children," Mr Coulson said."This can sometimes lead to less happiness among parents."The research suggests the more people value the parenting role, the less disturbance [it has] on their happiness."Mr Coulson also surveyed a number of children in a separate study, finding that kids whose parents were more engaged in their children's lives did better at school and were more social."Basically, the research found if you're happy as a parent, your kids are going to be doing well," he said."It [the research] presents the possibility that if parents feel like their kids are off track, they [parents] might want to consider how they feel about being a parent and look at ways to make those feelings more positive."Mr Coulson plans to continue the research, with the next survey directed at how to overcome and change parenting attitudes.He is looking for parents with children aged between five and 12 to fill out a questionnaire and complete some online activities.For more information, email jcoulson@uow.edu.au.STUDY FINDINGS€“ 10% of respondents were extremely dissatisfied with their lives€“ 58% were either satisfied or very satisfied with their lives€“ 70% of parents have positive attitudes towards being a parent€“ 18% of parents were unhappy in the parenting role most of the time€“ 45% will not smack their child when they're disobedient€“ 4% smack their children regularly€“ 35% parents don't see parenting as what they are supposed to be doing with their lives€“ 20% of kids aren't engaged in their lives
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