Don't Assume Family's Single Income Is Dad's
Newcastle Herald
Monday March 20, 2006
Dads can stay at home too, suggests Alysson Watson.
SINGLETON businessman Peter Eason makes some salient observations about the world we live in rampant commercialism, social chaos and family breakdown ("Every luxury except the time for family", The Herald, 17/3).And although he doesn't completely blame the "new breed of superwomen", the mothers who dare to work outside the home, preferring to lay it at the feet of the "two-income family", it's not the dads who are in his sights.They are doing the right thing working full-time, putting food on the table for their wives to cook.It's when a family wants a bit of new carpet (as his did, way back when), or when a mother wants a paid job, that it all goes to hell.I think the trouble started when we let girls go to school. An education gave young women hope that they might make a contribution aside from their biological one.Stop to consider this: when men become fathers, they don't step out of the workforce. Why then, should women when they become mothers?I speak as a mother of two who did step out of the workforce for a year after each baby, and re-entered only part-time until the youngest went to school.Some days, I don't know what I was thinking applying for a full-time job, but more often than not, I'm glad to be back.Yes, Mr Eason, life's a pressure cooker. The routine is set, the schedule is tight and we all get a bit tetchy. The kids are in after-school care, and when they're sick it all goes pear-shaped. But they're lucky they've got a dad who can look after them too.Which brings me to the point.Regardless of whether the "two-income family" is a construct of need or greed, there are two parents involved. And it's more often than not a mum and a dad.If kids are suffering because both parents are working, and I'm not entirely convinced of that, then what necessitates that it be the mother who stays at home or works part-time?The usual arguments are that it's "more natural", or that the man earns more, so it "makes sense" for the woman to stay home. I'm not sure either of these wash any more.Some mums want to stay home for a while. Some never want to go out again.But we never ask about the dads.I don't need to look too far in the office to see colleagues whose husbands are the home-makers.The co-ordinator of our school canteen is a dad who stays at home with his four kids while his wife works as a medical specialist.A mechanic friend who retrained as a remedial masseur took time out in between to be with the kids while his accountant wife retrained as a special needs teacher.Another, a computer programmer, works from home so he can be with the kids when his TAFE teacher wife goes to work.It's really not that tricky.It's perfectly legitimate to be worried about the impact of the two-income family. But it's not legitimate to make it only a women's issue.Alysson Watson is a Herald journalist and mother of two who has just returned to full-time work after 10 years' part-time
© 2006 Newcastle Herald